In Way of Explanation

Hello all! Sorry, I haven't posted in a while. Been distracted I guess. On with the show!


Dear Potassium,

Thank you for caring. :)

Also, your van is MASSIVE and hard for driving, also making interdigitation more difficult. However, it was still a fun little road trip for sure. :)

Utmost Sincerity,
Your Calcium


Dear Girls in General,

Don't stress it too much ok? You'll find your guy. Besides, stress is probably rather unattractive to most. Today's tidbit of advice: Try to be the kind of person you're looking for. If you want someone kind, try to be kind yourself. If you want someone spiritual, they probably won't be too interested in you unless you are spiritual as well. If you don't want a rude guy, don't be a rude girl. Etc. This won't fix all your problems, but it will help to make you more attractive to those who you are hoping to date. :) This exercise may also help you to actually realize what you really do want in a guy, and to start honestly looking for it, instead of a hot bod or some such. I accuse none of you of looking for a hot bod, but I know I have struggled with it in the past, so there you go. :)

I wish you the best!

Elder Mighill






Alright, so in my very first post, I mentioned that I was faux-dating our dear Potassium. I also mentioned that I was not going to explain what that meant. Fear not! Now is the time. :) Also, I'd like to explain the use of the word Potassium a little better.

So as for the history between Potassium and I, I will try to keep it rather condensed. If you want specific details, try to ask for them specifically, and I will do my best to specify. :)

So we met at Institute. {A class on Thursdays, run by the LDS church, where you can go learn more about the Gospel outside of the regular meetings on Sundays.} We didn't know each other very well. All the sudden she approaches one day after class and comments about how my blog {the one I write under my real name} is wonderful. She had seen a comment I'd made on someone else's blog, and had followed my profile back to my blog.
I of course then wanted to go read her blog. She told me where it was. As I read it, I came to respect her and understand some about her. It was wonderful to get that little window into her life and thoughts. I sent her an email commenting on my thoughts about her blog. We then met up at another ward activity the following Monday and started talking. This was sometime around mid-December I think... I'm horrible with days. ;)

Things moved pretty quickly. I got to go over to her house and hang out a couple different days for hours. That was very nice. Her family liked me a lot, and I liked them. But as we grew closer, her parents decided that they did not like me being so close to her with my mission coming up.They don't think we can build that kind of relationship with a two-year absence looming. We disagree on that point. In my efforts to convince them of our pure motives, I shared some past experiences that had helped shape me. We worry that the sharing of these things may have cast a negative light on me. But I don't feel too much regret. It felt like the right thing to say at the time.

In any case, they decided that they were going to do what they could to limit our contact to prevent us from becoming very close. We only see each other at ward activities and other rare times when we can find an excuse to see each other. It's tricky.
Her parents also seem rather undecided on the issue. Potassium has told me that some days her mother will seem agitated and upset at mention of me, and she seems to forbid my presence, or letting me pick her up from activities, etc. However, on other days, she seems to find things that I have done adorable. Like a little teddy bear I gave her. She has also at certain times expressed positive feelings towards me to Potassium. Very confusing.

Well! We grew closer anyway, as you may imagine. We had a very nice Christmas and a really great New Year's, the little that we did get to see each other. In all respects, we are quite nearly a committed couple. We still recognize that she may meet someone else while I am gone, and I am fine with that. I know she will make the decision carefully and prayerfully, and if she will be happier with him, then good for her. :) So the commitment almost has an exception there I guess. We also hardly get to see each other because of the restrictions created by her parents. That's ok though. We make the best of the time we have. Besides, 'all these things shall give thee experience, and shall be for thy good'. I have faith. :)


That's pretty much it. I guess it wasn't very short, but there you go. :) As for the use of the word Potassium, we started using it because of this meme:

We starting replacing 'K' with Potassium in our conversations as a joke, and then it became a nickname somewhere along the line. This may also help you understand the title of the blog. Translated, it says 'Romance, K?'. I hope this clears up some confusion. :)

Have a wonderful day everyone! Remember to smile! Also, please please try us with your questions. Smiles and I would ~love~ to have more questions to answer. It would also give me more to write about, and thereby result in more posts! Thanks! Bye!

Dear Becca

We got our first comment! It even doubles as our first question! Thank you Becca for that contribution. :) We will of course resume with regular programming to begin with, a Dear Girl bit, but fear not, Smiles and I will do our best to answer your question to your satisfaction. :)


Dear Potassium,

Your eyes. They make me smile.

I am also so incredibly glad that you are doing so much better today. :) :)

P.S.




**All rights belong to the Days of Wonder company, this is a picture of cards from their boardgame 'Ticket to Ride'.**

  ~I'm using these cards as an excuse to tell you that I love you.~ ;)

Hugs and Heartfelt Thanks,
The Giver of Always


Dear Becca,

Becca's question was as follows:

Here's a question for Smiles, at what point do you give up on a guy and say "it's useless! he doesn't like me,or at least not enough to ask me out! where is me ice cream??"

And for you Elder Mighill, how can a girl tell when a guy is just leading her on with no plans to actually ask her out?

This is a ~very~ good question. Thank you for the asking. I appreciate having something solid to post about. :) I will let Smiles answer first, and then proceed with what I think. :)

Thank you for your question, Becca. I congratulate you on being the very first person to comment on Elder Mighill's blog. :)

Okay, I am in no way an expert on girl/guy relationships, but in my few years dating, I have learned a few things that have helped me when it comes to many aspects of relationships. Allow me to share a few thoughts as I answer Becca's question:

First of all, it is not wise to ever lead a young man on falsely. Believe me. If your intents are genuine, be genuine. If your motives are to simply flirt with all the attractive guys, don't expect any of them to give you any sort of commitment. If you are merely a flirtatious young woman, they probably won't think you are worth it. However, if you are truly seeking a relationship, let them know. I know that isn't the kind of thing girls want to hear. They normally want the guys to make the first move. Well, I hate to break it to you, but in today's world, that doesn't always happen. In the three [semi]-relationships that I have had, two of them, I had to make the move and say, “Yeah, hey, I like you”. And guess what, both times the guy actually liked me back! [In my current relationship, it was the guy who first brought up the point of possibly having a relationship - 'Cause he's just awesome and manly like that.] But anyway, do tell them. Most likely, they will already be in like with you, and it will make things so much less awkward, and so much happier for both of you if you openly express your feelings for him, and quickly, rather than waiting for him to start something. :)

Second, a word of advice to all of you girls, and, yeah, guys too; don't even think about getting into a relationship with someone unless you are sure that you are ready for that kind of commitment. Don't be naive and think that being someone's girlfriend is all sunshine and roses. It's not. It's different. It's hard. It's complicated, and can be awkward. But that doesn't mean it isn't wonderful. ;) However, Satan loves to wreak havoc in relationships. Pray about it. Counsel with the Lord. He cares. I'm serious. Talk to Him. Ask Him for any sort of advice. If your desires are righteous, He will guide you in Light. :)

Now, if you have told a young man that you like him, have showered him with much affection, and you're positive that you want to move on into a outright committed relationship, and he still isn't figuring things out . . . the first thing I would suggest is to pray for him. Maybe he's scared. Maybe he's hurting from a past relationship. Maybe he just needs some angelic assistance. Pray for him, and look for any inclinations in his behavior that shows that he likes you even a teeny bit. If you find any pure, happy indicators that say, “Yep, he likes me”, just keep moving on with patience, and don't give up on him. [I know that's probably hard to hear, but sometimes you can't do anything more than that. Patience does pay off. Don't give up on him if he's worth any of your time. Be his friend. If friendship is all he wants right now, take that. Don't toss him away just because you want something more. Remember that in marriage, couples should be each others' very best friends. Take that friendship if that's all he's giving you, and run with it. Be patient, and your desires will be granted. I promise. :) If, however, you see no indicators of him being interested in you, and/or if he's rude and impolite and ungentlemanly, and if you find him to be lacking in integrity, and, frankly, a jerk, then you can let go of him. Move on, and remember, there are other fish in the sea. :)

I hope that answers your question! :)

{s m i l e s}

Thank you Smiles. Your input is greatly appreciated. :)

Smiles and I seem to have come to many of the same conclusions. I agree with what she has said. I would definitely echo what she said about not leading people on, and direct it at you male readers as well. Be careful. Be honest about your intentions. Now! On to my answer. :)

{Dear guys that are reading this post, this advice is fairly universal. You may find that it applies quite well to a girl that you can't figure out as well.}

This is a hard question to give straight answer to. The main problem is that when this kind of thing happens, the guy often is interested, but simply doesn't bother to, or doesn't have the guts to, make a move or ask the girl out. Some hope that a relationship may start to develop without effort. Some are simply looking to flirt and have some fun while they aren't actually looking for a relationship. Very few of the guys in this situation realize that they are driving the girl crazy and leading her on. The ones that do it intentionally are very few and very far between, and are not worth your time.

I digress.

I think one indicator to look for is honest concern and attentiveness. If they are flirting with you, but not listening to you or making any real, honest conversation or effort, then you know that they aren't really invested. That either means they aren't truly interested, or aren't worth your time. {Who wants a significant other that doesn't really care about you?}

I realize, however, that there are also situations where the guy is showing interest and attentiveness, has been for a while, is still making no moves, and is still lacking in the date-asking field. This means one of two things.

The first possibility is that they aren't looking for a relationship but do care about you. You may be surprised to learn that this does happen to guys too. Don't believe everything hollywood tells you. A major tell for this is if they talk to you about other girls as they would a close friend.

The other possibility is what I said earlier. They may either be hoping that a relationship will just develop on its own, or just haven't gathered the nerve to get up and do something about it. Or both. If you are worried that this is the case, try showing more interest. Try being a little more bold with showing how you feel. You may think you are being obvious already, but guys are very good at missing and second-guessing these kinds of clues. Be careful though. If they aren't interested and you start showing more interest, it might turn into that awkward moment where they have to tell you that they aren't actually interested in you.

In any case! I have two pieces of advice to wrap up with.

One. Be honest. If you like someone, and they seem to like you, talk to them about it. Find an appropriate, tactful way to confront them about it and ask them how they actually feel. I know from first-hand experience that this is no easy task for most. But it's like a particularly bad band-aid. It's so much better to just get it over with and avoid all the agony and confusion of being led on.

Two. If you believe in prayer, pray about it. I can testify that Heavenly Father cares about you and your love life. If it's important to you, it really is important to Him. He cares. Ask Him about it. Ask Him to help you to see what's going on. To discern this guy's intentions. To help you confront him. Or you could just pour your heart out and tell Him all about your troubles. Sometimes it really helps to gain clarity on an issue as you simply pray about it and tell Someone that you can't lie to about your true feelings and what you feel about the situation. He will help you, though it may be hard to see the help. I promise you He will.

I really hope this helped Becca. I wish you the best with your inscrutable guy. I wish the best to all of you toiling away at finding joy and peace in life.

With Care,
Elder Mighill





 
Becca, thank you again for the question. Feel free to ask more. That goes for the rest of you readers too. I would love to hear from you. We will help as much as we can with any question you have, dating or otherwise. :)

God be with you all. Remember to smile. I'll talk to you later. :)

Dear Girls {again}

Would you look at that! Followers! Inconceivable! Well! We're happy to have you. Enjoy. :)


Dear Potassium,

I love how you're following my blog. X) You're adorable.

I hope you enjoy the Cran-Raspberry juice. :) Thanks for a fun evening.

You are wonderful. Don't let that virus get you down. Get well soon. I believe in you. :)

It's pretty awesome having you around. Keep being you. :)

Always,
Elder Mighill


Dear Smiles,

Everyone please take note and give a warm welcome, Smiles is my co-writter here on 'Romance, Potassium?'. She will take any questions asked that are specified as to be answered by a girl, and will also give her input anywhere she feels she should. I'm happy to have her. :)

Anyway! Thanks for helping out Smiles, you rock. :) Let's hope we get some questions soon. :)

Sincerely,
The Other-Other Writer of This Blog


Dear Girls in General,

I have often been exposed to, and under the impresison of, the idea that the opposite gender is confusing. Guys are almost always impossibly and perplexingly confusing to girls, and girls are almost always complexly and preposterously confusing to guys. However, I am of the opinon that this idea gets a lot of hype and makes things much worse than they actually are. Perhaps a plethora of these confusion issues stem from a lack of communication.

In any case, I think a lot of these things that confuse people could easily be explained and understood. I would very much like to try as much as I can to remove this confusion. :)

I would exhort any of you who happen to be reading this post to ask Smiles and me anything that confuses you about the other gender. Anything that you don't get. We'll be happy to give you what knowledge we have.

And even if someone is confusing you, or the entire gender simply baffles you, don't stress too much. Just do what you can. I'm sure things will turn out for the best eventually anyway. :)

God Bless,
Elder Mighill





I can't stress enough how much I would love to get some questions from you, the readers. Don't feel like you may only ask a question about the topic of this post. Ask whatever you like. Ask about life. Ask for dating advice. Whatever the question, we will do our best to give you our best answer. :)

New button! :O

Dear Potassium,

I'm so glad you're feeling better, even if it's not all the way better. I'm excited to 'take you out to dinner'. ;)

Very Yours,
Elder Mighill

Dear Girls,

Lookit! A button made by this cool girl just for your {and my} benefit! :D



Isn't it nice? :) Sorry, no time for a real post. I'm very busy... Like super busy... With stuff... Important stuff... That totally exists... ... Anyway! I hope you appreciate the button as much as I do. :)

With Platonic Love,
Elder Mighill

I'll talk to you guys later. :)

Smile, questions?

Dear Potassium,

Love and Hugs,
Elder Mighill
{Calcium}



Dear Girls,

A positive attitude, with the ensuing smile, is {I honestly before my Heavenly Father can say,} infinitely more truly beautiful than any make up you could ever concoct.

I challenge you to do two things. One, try going without make up for a while. Or maybe just going a little bit lighter on the make up you do wear. You don't need it. I solemnly promise you that. You got this. :)

Secondly, I challenge you to try being positive and smiling more. You don't have to be overly energetic or in people's face about being happy. Just try taking a postivie outlook. Negative things don't ruin days. Negative outlooks ruin days. Or longer. There is often just as much good stuff going on in your life as there is bad stuff. Try to think about the good stuff more. It will make you more attractive, and will help you have a more wonderful life. :)

Hugs and Smiles,
Elder Mighill



Dear Everyone,

If you have any questions about dating, or even about life in general, please ask me. I would love to give you my two cents. And if you would rather have your advice from a girl, I have a friend that I'm planning on inviting to come co-write with me, and she is a girl. So we could get her take on whatever you like as well. :)

P.S. She is the one who designed this wonderful blog layout. I think it's quite nice, don't you? :)

Dying for Questions to Answer,
Elder Mighill



So I asked Elise about a 'Dear Girls' button, and she, in all her grace and charity, decided she would make one. Let's have a silent round of applause. :) So you can all expect me to start using a 'Dear Girls' button, made by her, in the near future. Awesome eh? I'm excited. :)

Try your best to make today awesome. :) You got this. Life is good if you decide it to be. :) Talk to you all later.

Post Number 'Eins'

First off, I am faux-dating {Sorry, no, I'm not going to explain what I mean by that right now.} a wonderful, kind, spiritual girl. Many of these blog posts will be referring to her. We will call her Potassium. It's an inside joke. Makes for a fun nickname I think. :) I will also often be using a format originally created by this cool girl over here: coolblog. This format is called 'Dear Boys'. I will of course be using a modified version called 'Dear Girls'. Now you know. Oh, one more thing. I'm leaving on a mission for the LDS Church in a little over a month. Hence the 'see you later' in the url. Also, on that note, I will be signing everything as Elder Mighill. {That's the original Irish spelling of my last name. Pronounced mile.} Let us continue, shall we? :)

Dear Girls

Dear Potassium,

Sometimes you are sick, and sometimes I worry about you. As a matter of fact, all times that you are sick, happen to be times that I worry about you. However, the times I worry about you are certainly not limited to when you are sick... Get well soon! :)

I love you.

Also, thank you for your help with grammar and spelling. I appreciate it. :)

Lastly, your romantic pins and sentiments make me happy. :) :)

That is all.

Yours,
Elder Mighill


Dear girls in general,

I realize that you are wearing 'sexy' clothing in order to get guys to notice you and talk to you. But I can guarantee you that by taking this approach, you will attract all of the guys that only decide to come talk to you because they think you are 'hot'. Many of the decent guys will probably be too intimidated by your 'sexy' look to come talk to you anyway. Your personality, and everything else, will take a back seat to this 'sexy'-ness that you used to get their attention. I am sorry. :( If you want guys to like you for your personality, stop dressing so they notice your body first. You are so much more than just a body. :)

Sincerely and Caringly,
Elder Mighill

In honor of my first 'Dear Girls' post, I am going to use the button that she usually would instruct girls to use with their 'Dear Boy' posts:








Hmmm. I wish she had a 'Dear Girls' button... Maybe I'll ask her about making one...

Have a wonderful day! Smile! I'll talk to you all later.